WORD

I haven't made an entry in here in quite a while. I've just been too busy. Recently moved back to AZ, and it feels amazing besides being completely broke. I moved into a house about a week ago with Ben and Austin and it is absolutely fantastic. Living in a house is way more chill than in an apartment, of course. My friends Justin and Eric left yesterday to go on a wilderness expedition they had been planning. They won't be back for another month. Hopefully they won't be too severely mauled (or raped) by anything. I have to sell my car soon to help out with the increasing debt we owe on the house, which blows but at least I'll be getting back in shape on the bike. Overall, things are looking up.

Scattered

I painted a picture on the wall. It was beautiful, sound, and concrete. But I was too modest like always. So, the picture left the wall feeling forsaken and rejected seeking acceptance. The picture saw things walking down the street amongst the crowd that it had never seen. It saw diversity. The picture liked this new found diversity. It saw beauty which it could not comprehend. It saw hatred which hit it like a brick in the face. No longer did that innocence blind it. The picture felt alive for the first time. It had no boundaries, no limits, and no rules to follow. It could do whatever it wanted. The picture was not aware of society's boundaries, limits, and rules therefore it did exactly what it saw fit. The picture stole. The picture killed. The picture ran naked through the streets. The picture told every person he was hopelessly in love with them. The picture looted. The picture burned houses down. The picture broke into department stores and graffiti'ed nonsense all over the walls. The picture had sex with animals. The picture did whatever it wanted. Society shunned it for these things. It was cast out from everything. Lost, defeated, and broken-spirited the picture had nowhere to run, nowhere to flee to. No one to call up and say, "Hey, help me out, man. I'm in a jam." The picture missed me. It wished desperately that I would come and rescue it. Of course, how could I forgive the picture for what it did? It totally just abandoned me with no sign of remorse or regret, until now. There would be no reconciliation. Ostracized from everything, the picture was prone to do one thing only. It found a desolate, blank wall. The picture painted a picture on the wall. It was beautiful, sound, and concrete. But the picture was too modest like always.

Iron Man

Iron Man. Iron Man I am. I crush the spirits of every child, woman, and man. Iron Man. Iron Man I am. Solitude is my fortress, and I it's captain. I have no inflictions, I bare the inflictions. I laugh at incompetence, humanity is incompetence. Iron Man. Iron Man I am. I don't need friends or acquaintances, they only provide instability and weakness. Iron Man. Iron Man I am.


Desperate Man. Desperate Man I am. I am the lonely man. I know no adversity, but I know no love. Friends forgot my name years ago. Desperate Man. Desperate Man I am. Nobody calls, I call people to inform them on how I'm doing. Ocean waves know me better than anybody. Desperate Man. Desperate Man I am. I cast pebbles in a lake only to get a reaction. I know human interaction just like the desert recognizes a snowstorm. I hate myself just to have memories of other people. Desperate Man. Desperate Man I am. I died 20 years ago. Can you remember me? Desperate Man. Desperate Man I am.


Iron man. Iron man I am. You say you're happy when really you're just filling this superficial void you created when you were a child. You know happiness just like I know failure. And what do you know about anything? I conquer. I divide. I am the do all and end all. I am the Alpha and the Omega. Iron Man. Iron man I am. I am self-reliable. I am THE oppressor of everything. What do you know about progression? I lift a finger and the world progresses. I lift a finger and buildings collapse. I lift a finger and oceans divide. I lift a finger and planets implode. I lift a finger and war occurs. I lift a finger and genocide occurs. I lift a finger and it's the worst day of your life. Iron man. Iron man I am.


Desperate Man. Desperate Man I am. I fake happiness. I rely on TV sitcoms for emotional structural support. Desperate Man. Desperate Man I am. I'm your complete worst nightmare, and I can't comprehend why. I'm metal scraping on a chalkboard to you. Desperate Man. Desperate Man I am. I've got nothing left. Nothing to lose. I smile, you frown. You avoid me wherever you turn, wherever you go. You'd rather jump out in front of a bus than to share a word with me. You're obnoxious with your distance. I've been distant for too long. I'm livid. I'm a thorn that's been blooming for years. I feed off awkwardness. I feed off your insecurities. I feed off tragedy. Iron Man. Iron Man I am.

In Response To...

Store plenty of gasoline in the car. Buy some lighter fluid. Put the key in the ignition. Drive far away. Forget all the people you know. Turn the radio up as far as it can go. Ignore stop signs, road hazards, and speed limits. Go as fast as your speedometer can take you. Stop for nothing. Drive for sanity. Disregard hunger pains. Drive faster if it rains. The road is your enemy. Burn it up. Don't worry about driving correctly. Just drive. When you absolutely cannot drive any longer, find a remote place and park the car. Burn it up. Vacate the area and walk home.

Don Knott-Knowing

You know...I'm afraid of being THAT guy. The guy that enters a room and everybody says, "Oh, here's THAT guy." I don't want to be afraid. But I am. The guy that everybody is just kind of uncertain about. "Like, what is up with THAT guy?" I can hear 'em now. I can't help but laugh. Everybody laughs and says, "Oh, THAT guy." I can't help but laugh.

OUTKAST

Dont let em Dont let em Dont let em Dont let em Change us Change us Change us Change us

We got dem bootleg Idlewild dvd's I got dat dro I got dat light green

Starts off like a small-town mary Lovely wife and life Baby carriage Now all the stars and cars Hollywood Divorce...

YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH BADAYADAYA BODEODEODEO BAYAYADAYADA BODEODEODEO

My heat is in the trunk along with that quad knock No my heart don't pump no koolaid Quickly They ain't gone get me Got somethin' fo em The devil up in yo grill and you still don't even know 'em Show 'em Who's the ok

Step into my shoes You crews sittin' on truths And those for the hoes only when we rollin' through Atlanta skies be blue The sun is beamin' it seemin' That I glisten Rather gleaming

LAST FUCKING SHOW, MAN!

It's blank/life's last show tonight. It's going to be a great time. I'm going to miss the shit out of nights like these.